![]() People who can afford the rent this close to downtown Toronto are comfortably asleep by this time. The first floor and lobby are equally empty. When I push the elevator button, it creaks out a complaint at being disturbed at so ungodly an hour. The lights seem dimmed, as if overpowered by the emptiness. I pick up my keys, clasping my fist around them so they don't jangle, ease open the door, and creep into the hallway.Įverything's quiet. There's a pile of clothing tucked underneath my dresser so I won't risk the squeaks and groans of opening drawers and closets. Philip doesn't stir when I slip from the bed. I've got to get out of here-I don't have a lot of time left. The rage forms a tight ball in my gut and threatens to explode. The burning sensation in my skin spreads down my arms and legs. He's another reason why I shouldn't leave, sneaking out in the middle of the night again and returning with a torrent of lame excuses. ![]() I clench my eyes shut, willing the sensations to stop but they don't. ![]() My heart beats so fast I have to gulp air. Patches of skin behind my knees and elbows have been tingling and now begin to burn. Four nights spent cramming to meet a deadline have left me exhausted. ![]() It's nearly two a.m., too late for this foolishness and I need my sleep. My battle is as futile as a woman feeling the first pangs of labor and deciding it's an inconvenient time to give birth. ![]()
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